There are 2 ways to escape a wrist or lapel grab.
Today I’ll show you both ways to escape the wrist or lapel grab and when you should use each one.
The Self-Defense Wrist Grab Escape
The prototypical escape to a wrist or lapel grab taught in the majority of “self-defense” or martial arts classes is to simply break the hold. This usually means turning your hand up or down to break the wrist grab.
While this usually works to escape the hold it will leave you with a problem… your attacker is still there and ready to make his next move which after your escape will likely be move violent.
Joint Locks to Escape the Wrist Grab
Another popular idea is to take the person into a joint lock of some kind. While this can work the concept is typically incorrect due to the complexity of standing joint locks and the fact that people’s natural reaction is to pull away which will virtually always defeat a standing joint lock.
It isn’t that they can’t work but the question you should be asking is “is there a better way?”
Why Escaping the Grab Shouldn’t Be Your Goal
As mentioned earlier if you merely escape a grab to the wrist or lapel or wherever you haven’t done a single thing to prevent your attacker’s next move.
You are turning over the script for them to write. They get to decide if they leave you alone, grab you again, or more likely come in swinging or tackling this time, or they pull out a weapon on you.
I’ve read statistics that shows that the person who hits first wins fights 90% of the time. While there are several factors going into this the point is clear… Simply doing a wrist escape move allows them to hit first.
Our solution to this problem… Injure on the First Beat!
Injure on the 1st Beat
Injuring on the 1st beat simply means this; the very first move that you do will create an injury or an injury-like response.
That doesn’t mean pull your hand away and then hit them; because that would be 2 moves or 2 “beats.”
It does mean that you should pick a target on their body and do a single movement, a straight line attack to that target.
By attacking to escape instead of trying to break their grab to escape you accomplish 2 things:
- You actually escape – people will let go of a grab when hurt
- You have created an entry or first strike – thus improving your odds of winning
This can become even more important if you are being grabbed on your clothing where you may not be able to break the grip of a stronger attacker.
So to simplify it… if you are grabbed simply attack them. There is no need for you to escape, if you smash them in the testicles trust me… they will let go.
Picking Your Targets
As mentioned earlier we don’t want to use move that have a low likelihood of success. You want to maximize your potential to win. The quicker the fight is over the safer you and your loved ones are.
Targets should be chosen using the following criteria:
- Easy to get to
- Low complexity – easy enough for a beginner to do
- Will work against a larger, stronger, tougher opponent
While there are several great targets I always tell students to prioritize 3… the eyes, the throat, and the testicles. I’m sure I don’t need to tell you why.
What I will mention is that we have all been accidentally (or on purpose) poked in the eye and we all know what happens. About a minute or so of uncontrolled blinking, covering our face, possibly on our hands and knees.
Any guy will tell you what it is like to be hit in the testicles.
You may or may not have ever been hit in the throat. I got blasted playing red rover when I was in high school… G’DAMN that was awful.
While hitting someone in the nose, jaw, or temple can potentially cause a knockout I would ask you to consider how tough your attacker is vs. how hard you can hit. A solid left hook to Brock Lesner’s jaw might not do much compared to a shin to the testicles.
And unless you are larger, stronger, and tougher than your attacker please don’t even consider strikes to the body.
Eyes & Testicles vs. Throat
Just remember that typically a strike to the eyes or testicles usually creates a temporary injury-like response without an actual injury.
While a hard shot to the throat has the potential to create a mild to serious injury.
So my best advice is to go after the throat only if you are in a high threat situation such as:
- Multiple attackers
- Woman attacked by a man
- Armed attacker
- Significant size / athletic gap in their favor
- etc.
Follow Up Your Escape
You would never escape and then stand around waiting to be attacked again would you?
Of course not!
So have your options planned out in advance… such as right now.
If you stun your attacker with a kick to the testicles and have time to get in your car or behind a locked door then go for it.
If you don’t have time then follow up with an attack of appropriate force.
If you are in a life-threatening situation that might mean getting a weapon. If it is a medium level such as another person your size who is unarmed then straight blast down their middle, Thai clench them, and finish them with knees, headbutts, elbows, more kicks to the testicles, etc.
If you have kids or grandma in a wheelchair to consider then I guess running isn’t an option so you better know how to follow up with fighting!
Get your reps.
Just Escape the Wrist Grab?
Is there ever a time that just breaking the wrist or lapel grab is the correct thing to do vs. injuring them on the 1st beat?
Of course, and we better know the difference before we really NEED TO KNOW the difference.
If you are certain there won’t be violence then you should simply use a traditional escape.
If you are NOT certain there won’t be violence or you ARE certain there will be violence then use the injure on the 1st beat tactic.
Simple.
Here’s a fun story as an example. I had a female student who in the past had experienced domestic violence. She came to me to learn to defend herself and break that cycle. Well she got pretty good what we teach.
One night she was at a dance club and a man was being rather aggressive towards her trying to get her to dance with him. He grabbed her by the wrist and pulled her in.
… She popped him right in the eye with an eye strike! Dropped him like a sack of potatoes to the floor. The bouncers came over and he was kicked out of the club.
Now everything worked out in this instance but this might have been a time when she could have done the traditional wrist escape, stepped back and warned him to leave her alone or she would call the bouncers over.
Then again I’m no psychic maybe this worked out best for her.
While his wrist grab was inappropriate and douchy it wasn’t a violent attack so I’m gald she didn’t follow up with a straight blast, Thai clench, head throw, and repeated stomps to the noggin.
Another woman I trained was at a convenience store and a man kept sexually harassing her by grabbing her butt and after she repeatedly told him to stop he pulled her in by her wrist. She grabbed a can of soup and smashed it into his face knocking out some of his teeth.
As he lay on the ground in pain she got the hell out of there.
Clearly injuring on the 1st beat works. Just make sure you know when and how to use it.
Why Were You Grabbed?
The final point that is worth mentioning is why were you grabbed in the first place?
There are 2 times you can be grabbed:
- During the fight
- Before the fight
People grab during a fight so they can get leverage and pull you into their punches, or they just panic and grab and squeeze because they don’t know what they are doing.
In either of these instances you want to injure on the 1st beat ASAP.
But if you are grabbed before a fight or as part of a bullying event – which is what I suspect most of you are thinking about when you think about being grabbed by the wrist or lapel – then we have a whole different topic that needs to be addressed.
People who grab others without throwing strikes (at least yet) are trying to intimidate and bully.
Now this could be a mugger, a school bully, domestic violence, a drunk guy at a bar, etc. Or in the case of our 2 ladies earlier it was a macho guy who was using intimidation to get try and get his way with a female.
As a general rule what you should remember is that predators don’t go after other predators; they go after prey. Alcohol, drugs, mental disorders, and occasionally ego will cause exceptions to this rule.
So if you have been grabbed like this in the past or are worried about it in the future please consider that you are being identified (correctly or incorrectly) as prey. That means your body language is giving off signals that you don’t have confidence. That you won’t fight back. And you should address this ASAP.
I made another article & video on what body language predators look for and what to do about it. You can read it here.
Final Thoughts
- Determine if violence can be avoided – if yes use a wrist escape; if no then injure on the first beat
- Prioritize vulnerable targets: eyes, throat, and testicles
- Follow up by getting to safety, continuing your attack unarmed, or if you are in life-threatening danger get a weapon
- Become the kind of person who predators and bullies want to avoid by improving your body language and confidence
Until next time,
Brian
